Monthly Archives: May 2014

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Sunshine & Thunderstorms

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Dear Ellie:

You played in the sun all day today. In fact every time the sun shines I try to make sure we take advantage partly because I want you to be active and partly because selfishly I want to spend as much time seeing you play as possible because it truly makes my day so much better. Also considering you braved your first brutal, drawn out, harsh, arctic Chicago winter like a seasoned professional you deserve every bit of sun that you can get. Today though as we took a walk with Daddy I realized that it was probably going to storm just as the weather man predicted and I mentioned that I needed to get a new umbrella because my old one broke and Daddy turned and said to me “well the rain is going to come”. A simple enough response and the kind you probably know by now your Daddy always gives. But with this simple response it dawned on me that we really do have to enjoy the sunshine and I mean realllly enjoy it not do the things we love but still have our worries and troubles in the back of our minds. I truly hope you live in the moment. Even when you get to your teen years and have that pimple that just won’t go away or when you enter “the real world” and every time you check the mail there’s a bill. No matter what phase of life you are in when you read this live in your moment and define your moment for what you want it to be not by what is thrown at you. Because my baby the storm will come and it will thunder, lighting, hail and more but just as sure as it will come the storm will go and you’ll realize a few rain drops even a couple pieces of hail did not destroy you. And when your storm comes I hope that you didn’t spend your moment in the sun before the storm worrying about how loud the thunder would be or how hard it would pour. You can’t control the weather and you can’t stop hard times from coming but you can enjoy every good moment so much so that the storm doesn’t seem so bad. And tonight the storm did in fact come just like Daddy said but even when I cringed as the thunder rumbled and the rain fell because I didn’t want it to wake you, you stayed peaceful. So I pray that during your storms you find peace just like you had tonight even long after Mommy is no longer there (or wanted) to rock you to sleep. There will be times that you’ll want to pray for the storm to end or for a way out but some storms you just have to weather and honestly my baby its not as bad as it seems that I can promise you. In fact when you can look back and realize that you now know who’s truly in your corner because they were the ones holding up your umbrella or even your own strength to keep pressing when you can only see two inches in front of you in the rain that in itself will be worth it. Have faith that each moment has its purpose the good, bad and ugly. You don’t have to know the big picture just HAVE FAITH. And my baby believe me even when you think you’ve figured out the big picture little do you know there are a million more pieces to the puzzle. So again I say just enjoy your sunshine don’t worry yourself about the storms because they are sure to come and they are sure to go. 

Love Always,

Mommy

P.S. To the little girl standing in the rain with no shelter in sight have faith that no storm last forever and the storm doesn’t mean that your journey ends sometimes its a sign to take another route or sometimes it just an opportunity to dance. And remember you are not alone every one experiences rain it never falls on just one person. So however you choose to face your storm know that you can make back to your sunshine. 

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A Different World

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Dear Ellie,

I love to watch you in your innocence like when I’m watching “A Different World” and you smile and dance to the theme song. To you it’s just a song you recognize and like but to fans of the show it’s a sitcom representation of the experience that only a small group are lucky to know. I thought of this because today is May 19th a date I’m likely to never forget because it’s the date I graduated from college. I didn’t graduate from just any college though I attended and graduated from a HBCU (historically black college or university) and so did Daddy. I’m sure by the time you read this you will have heard Daddy and I talk about our HBCU’s a ton but I truly hope you grasp the importance of them. Regardless of if you attend Clark Atlanta University like me, Grambling State University like daddy, or any other college (should you choose to go to college at all) I want you to always respect the value of learning because it is an opportunity that was not afforded to many of your ancestors and many girls around the world still fight to be able to learn. I’m writing you this today because while you are blissfully unaware we currently live in the age of social media where a person can make a public statement to the entire world in a matter of seconds whether intentional or not. This was the case recently when a young lady chose to make a statement regarding a GPA at a HBCU being inferior to the same GPA at a “rigorous” PWI. I’m relaying this story to you not because her opinion is special but because it is likely to continue to be shared by others. But my baby I hope you know that it is the person that matters not the GPA. Your Daddy is a perfect example with multiple degrees from both an HBCU and “rigorous” PWI’s but what makes him amazing has nothing to do with his degrees where they came from or the GPA that accompanies them it’s his determination and all the qualities that got him where he is the same qualities that our ancestors had when they literally risked their lives to get an education. To them it did not matter if their GPA was “comparable” but rather that it was theirs they earned it and it could not be taken away from them. It was also those qualities that made Malala Yousafzai speak out for her right to be educated even after being shot in the head for doing so. You too my baby have those qualities and it’s what will push you to the other side of the mountains that try to block your path but when you find yourself on the other side I hope you remember the uphill battles that were fought before you to carve an easier path. Most importantly never look down on those who still have to chop their way through rugged terrain because maybe just maybe they are headed to higher plateau than you think.

Love You Always (even if you don’t choose my alma mater),

Mommy

P.S. To every young girl take charge of your education if your school system is failing find a way or make one to educate yourself. You’re brilliant believe that and take stock in your intelligence.

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My Girl, Your World

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Dear Ellie:

By the time you read this you won’t remember but ever since you were just Ellie in my Bellie your Daddy played songs like My Girl by the Temptations for you. And at least twice a day one of our bear hugs includes me saying “Hi My Baby” and that’s just what you are daddy’s girl and my baby…our precious little girl. I know your presence in our lives is exactly why the recent events that include over 200 girls being taken from a school in Nigeria and some of the kidnapped girls being subsequently sold into “marriage” hit my heart so hard. I don’t know if this event will be included in your school history books especially because unfortunately history books will not always includes stories about girls that look like you, just like the girls who were taken, with brown skin and curly hair. But my baby I promise to always teach you about your world and our history. I hope you take my efforts to do this as a lesson to always search for your own truths and to learn as much about your world as you can. When I say your world I mean the whole globe because it’s right there at your finger tips. You are fortunate to live in a world where information is so readily available to you. So I hope your world view at 5 will be bigger than mine when I first traveled internationally at 20. You are my girl but this is your world and as you explore it I hope you find goodness in it but when you learn of things that will tug at your heart like 100’s of parents crying out for a terrorist group to bring back our girls its then that you should remember this is your world and you can make a difference in it. So whether you choose to be a hands on revolutionist raising your fist against the powers that be, a doctor traveling to the far corners of the earth donating medical services, an educator that inspires future generations, or just someone who cares for others in their time of need be active in your world and never let anyone tell you that your part doesn’t make a difference because we need you and your gift. Learn your history so you can know your truth and explore your world so you can find your place in it.

 

Love You Always My Baby!

Mommy

P.S. Every little girl is important and has a place and purpose in the world. No one can stop you but you. So I pray every night that not only are the girls captured from their school in Nigeria returned but also that they remember they are still here and the world still needs them. So whether a kidnapper or a bully there are cowards in the world don’t let them break you WE NEED YOU!

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Open Letter

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Dear Ellie:

Everyday Mommy thinks of something that I hope I remember to teach you when you’re old enough to understand and every week I work with young girls and I hope I can help them remember life lessons that will help them along their way. So I decided to start a blog to be used as an open letter that you can read when ever you want and can also be shared with daughters around the world. I know that sounds big but that’s my biggest hope for you. DREAM BIG MY BABY!! You can do ANYTHING! By the time you can read this I will probably have told you that 2 million times but I pray you never forget to tell yourself that because the world will constantly throw reminders at you that will suggest that you can’t do something…DON’T BELIEVE IT! I hope my voice will stay in the back of your head telling you to keep going, keep reaching, don’t give up, if you fail it will only make you better the second, third, fourth, time around! But Mommy knows that sometimes disappointment and tough times can drown out the good thoughts so you will always have these letters to get you back on track. Always remember you are my sunshine so keep shining bright!

Love You Always

Mommy

P.S. To other girls reading this the same applies to you. Every girl is special and is someone’s sunshine and if you don’t know whos sunshine you are BE YOUR OWN AND MAKE YOUR OWN LIGHT!!

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