Dear Ellie:
There’s a frequently used African proverb that states it takes a village to raise a child. I’ve heard that proverb a million times, and by the time you’re able to read this you probably will have heard it a million times too. I am just realizing that with our work being so connected, thanks to technology, that village is no longer just our elders, neighbors, friends, teachers etc. It’s not just the people who have held you, come to visit you, or welcomed you into this world. No, my baby, I realized today that the village is bigger than that. It’s the figures you see on the screen, the images you read about in your books, and people you learn about in museums. I realized today, as I watched you watch the movie Hidden Figures, that I was watching you see yourself in a little girl who liked shapes. At the same time I was seeing myself in a mom who just wanted the best for her child; a child with a gift for much more than shapes. And while you may never meet Taraji, Janelle, or Octavia who played the three main characters in the movie, they had an impact on you today that I can’t deny. I can however promise to continue to do my best to find figures for you outside of myself to add to your village that you can see a piece of yourself in. I want you to see the beauty, good, honesty, curiousity, perseverance, fortitude, ability, and so much more in yourself; starting by seeing it in other people. And while I strive every day to be the best example for you to watch the greatness in you is so large that it would be a disservice to pretend that I’m all you need. You are at a critical point in life where you are creating an image of yourself in a carefree way because you don’t even realize you’re doing it; but I do. I see your wheels turn when you watch Simone flip, when you see Chloe of Syncopated Ladies tap dance, or listen to Michele speak. It’s the same wheels that turn when you watch your Aunty Charisma sing, watch your Grammy garden, your Yeye baking, or see a picture of your GodMommy Kristin in her white Doctors coat. Every time those wheels turn the picture of yourself in your head gets a little clearer and a little stronger. I want you to know that you are connected to all these images that light a spark in you from the drive you read about in your new favorite book about Wilma Rudolph to the beauty in mommy’s natural hair that curls tight like yours. The ease of access to images in this world can be intimidating as a parent, but I choose to use it to show you the best, to build a digital village for you that is encouraging and inspiring. I choose to find figures for you that make you proud, make you want more, make you think, and make you smile. I don’t know if your dream of going to outer space will be temporary or if it will shoot you past the stars but I do know that you will never find it hard to imagine yourself there or anywhere else you want to go, and I’m thankful for everyone behind movies like Hidden Figures that tell stories that you see yourself in until you can write your own. 

Love you always, 

Mommy

P.S. – To the little girl looking for herself but can’t find the positive…surround yourself with those who exhibit the qualities you wish to have. Even if it’s just following nothing but positive people on social media you may see sooner than you think that you fit right in with the village you build for yourself.